February 2, 2012

Video Contest: Win a Government Website Usability Test

 What? Monster trucks in government?! It's a video throwdown from GSA's First Fridays Product Testing Program. They're sponsoring a contest: make a two-minutes-or-less video explaining why your agency deserves a free usability test. You could win. That means testing your site or app with real live customers and getting expert guidance on how to improve it.  

Want to do usability testing on your federal website but don’t have funds or staff? Enter the "Win a Free Website Usability Test" Video Contest. Contest deadline is February 29, 2012.

Submit a video (two minutes or less) addressing why your government website or web application is a good candidate for a free usability test. Make a creative video explaining the importance of your site, the problems you think need fixing, and a creative push for why you should win.

• Your site must be a public-facing .gov or .mil website
• Your team must work with First Fridays to plan the test
• Your site stakeholder or designee must observe a First Fridays test
• If you win, your site stakeholder must attend your usability test

The GSA First Fridays Product Testing Program has tested over 25 government websites. After a morning of in-depth testing with real website customers, the team meets over lunch and identifies quick-fix solutions to the top three problems.

Now’s your chance. Contest winners must be willing to make site improvements within 30 days of the test and learn to do simple usability testing.  Why? Because small changes have a BIG impact on customer experience.

To sign up to observe a First Fridays test, email FirstFridays@gsa.gov

January 16, 2012

Web Content Write-a-Thon: March 2 in Silver Spring, MD

Get Hands-on Help Writing Your Own Content

No, it's not a dance-a-thon or a walk-a-thon. It won't make you tired or give you sore feet. It's a Web Content Write-a-Thon. Sign up for this half-day hands-on web writing workshop, and make progress on your own web content project.
This Write-a-Thon isn't a traditional class. It's an afternoon, away from your office, where you'll have uninterrupted time to work on your web content, and you'll get individual help from E-WRITE's expert web writing instructor, Leslie O'Flahavan. Enroll by yourself or bring your colleagues. You can work on your own or in a small group.

 

You should enroll in the Web Content Write-a-Thon if you

• Need an afternoon of peace and quiet to write or revise your web content
• Want help from E-WRITE (Leslie O'Flahavan, etc.) and others who attend the Write-a-Thon
• Have suffered from web content writers' block
• Need help deciding what new content to write, how to revise what you have, or how to repurpose a print document for the web
• Find it easier to work amongst others who have a similar task
• Want input on your content from a neutral outsider who's not caught up in office politics

 

You will receive

• Handouts containing web writing guidance and before-and-after web content examples
• A 100-item web writing resource list
• Snacks (nutritious and otherwise)

 

What you should bring

• Your laptop and whatever you need to connect to WiFi at the Silver Spring Civic Building
• Soft copies or hard copies of the web pages you'll be working on
• Any documents you'll need for reference or repurposing

 

Tuition refund policy: You will receive a full refund if you cancel before February 27, 2012. If you cannot attend, you may send a substitute.

Questions? E-mail Leslie O'Flahavan or call 301-989-9583.

 

 

January 13, 2012

Online communities: How high-quality writing makes private workspaces work

I'd like to introduce guest blogger Michelle Bishop, Vice President at  Collaborative Communications Group. Among the many things she does at Collaborative, Michelle helps clients such as United Way Worldwide and the College Board develop and maintain online "communities of practice." These online communities enable people to work together even when they're separated by distance, time zone, affiliation, expertise, or employer. Online communities help people continue the work they've launched at conferences or other meetings.

I recently had a great discussion with Michelle about how the quality and types of writing in these online communities can determine whether the community achieves its goals. Here's some advice about writing in online communities - in Michelle's own words:

"Online communities provide private spaces for groups to share information, deepen relationships, collaborate, and conduct business across distances. What people are trying to achieve in these online communities influences the tone, pace, and approach of their writing. In our work with online communities of practice, writing has three main purposes:

1. Writing to build community
2. Writing to provide value
3. Writing for reference

 

Writing to build community

Community-building writing focuses on strengthening interpersonal relationships or offering personal advice on a shared issue. This type of writing often takes place in a discussion area or via social networking. When writing to build community, the writing should be informal, conversational, and personal. 

Writing to provide value

Writing to provide value to the community is more formal. It might take the form of an email blast to the entire community. A community facilitator may send out a message about a news article, recently posted resource, or new research finding. The key to success is to clearly communicate the value of the message quickly and succinctly. Writers should use a clear, value-oriented subject line; bullets to summarize the information; and visible links to the item of interest. The recipient must be able to scan the information and understand its value immediately. 

Writing for reference

Writing for reference happens when a community member or facilitator posts a document, tool, or resource to a library or document repository. In this case, the key aspect of the writing will be the use of keywords and tags, so members can retrieve the resource at a later date. If a summary or brief synopsis is included, it should include the key descriptors that a member would use to search for the item in the future. The tone members use when writing for reference may be more formal and the text more detailed than when writing to build community or provide value."

Do you participate in an online community of practice? If so, please comment here to share your thoughts about the writing that goes on in your community.

January 11, 2012

This law firm's marketing copy is so dry it makes me thirsty

My goodness. This brochure copy from a Baltimore law firm -- one I've worked with and really like -- has to be the flattest, driest writing ever.

Legal Services Available
Based on conversations and inquiries made by several of our current clients, we would like to remind everyone of the array of legal services we can provide. Either individually or in conjunction with other attorneys that we have formed close strategic partnerships with, we are able to offer services in the following practice areas ...

This marketing copy presents the least compelling wording possible. Let’s examine how.

A deadly dull offer

As a value proposition, “Legal Services Available” is akin to Macy’s saying “We Sell Stuff.” I checked out the competitions’ websites, and — to no one’s surprise — discovered that other Baltimore law firms do write marketing copy that has a pulse:

• “Lawyers Helping Your Business Grow.” Whiteford, Taylor & Preston keeps it simple and focuses on its practice area.
• “Former Insurance Company Attorney Now Fighting for You.” Glusing & Muher brings some history and some muscle.
• “We make sure you’re ready. Before you’re even sure you need to be.” Miles & Stockbridge makes it personal… and deep.
• “Smart in your world.” Arent Fox‘s tag line may be perplexing, but at least it’s interesting.

Targeted brochure copy that’s directed to “everyone”?

Wordy, impersonal copy rarely sells. Does the brochure’s first sentence need to mention both “conversations” and “inquiries”? Are only the “current” clients asking? Does this firm really want to "remind everyone” about the “array” of services?

Targeted brochure copy should address the reader as “you.” My non-scientific study revealed that many law firms are reluctant to write in second person. Most firms use the third person “clients” instead, leaving actual clients or prospects to wonder “You talkin’ to me?” An example from DLA Piper:

• “From the quality of our legal advice and business insight to the efficiency of our legal teams, we believe that when it comes to the to the way we serve and interact with our clients, everything matters.”

 

A couple of brave firms took the second person plunge:

• Glusing & Muher: “You need a lawyer that goes beyond the immediate details of your legal issues…”
• Silverman Thompson Slutkin & White: “…your case will be personally handled by a hand-picked team of veteran trial lawyers, each of whom brings a vast, unparalleled and diverse level of litigation experience to the courtroom."

 

I think this "you" copy is stronger. Talking directly to prospective clients helps them think, "Yep, I do need that kind of lawyer."

Using 27 words when 15 will do

Cut, cut, then cut. Let’s take this whole 27-word sentence and cut it down to size:

• Wordy: “Either individually or in conjunction with other attorneys that we have formed close strategic partnerships with, we are able to offer services in the following practice areas …”
• Streamlined: “Individually or with our partner attorneys, we offer services in the following practice areas …”

 

Marketing copy with a “you” attitude

Who writes high-quality legal marketing copy? The Byrd Law Firm does. Byrd’s website, which won a Graphic Design USA 2011 American Web Design Award, deserves recognition for pairing stunning images with marketing copy that has a “you” attitude:

• “Are you tired of waiting for your insurance company? Call us today.”
• Contact us if you’ve been harmed by a dangerous drug.”
• If you’ve been seriously injured in an accident, call us for help”

 

Want to share your own example of lively marketing copy or a law firm’s great website? Post your comment here.

January 4, 2012

Your Honor, could you repeat that ... in plain language?

A plain language colleague recently shared this tale about jury duty. (He's given me permission to use it.) Here's the story, in his own words:

"If you are called to serve as a grand juror in the District of Columbia, as I have been, you are sworn in using the following oath.  Do you have any idea what you are swearing to?...

Do you and each of you as members of the grand jury for the District of Columbia solemnly swear that you will diligently, fully and impartially inquire into and true presentment make of all offenses which shall come to your knowledge and of which the superior court of the District of Columbia has cognizance: that you will present no one from hatred or malice nor leave anyone unpresented from fear, favor, affection, reward, or hope of reward; that you will keep secret everything said, discussed, or viewed in the grand jury room and that you will to the best of your ability perform all the duties enjoined upon you, so help you God?

...After [we jurors had taken] the oath, the judge asked if there were any questions.  I raised my hand and said that we had just sworn to do something that was unclear to me, and that I particularly did not understand the meaning of the word 'present' as used in the oath.  I asked the judge if he could please explain to me what we had sworn to. 

After much deliberation, he said that we swore to carefully consider the evidence and make an impartial decision.  He also said that he would ask the chief judge if the oath could be rewritten more clearly.

I’ll be released from jail next week.  (Just kidding.)"

Great story. I like how it took the judge "much deliberation" to paraphrase the oath in plain language and how he needed to ask permission to have the oath rewritten so it would be easier for jurors to understand!

My colleague's story made me curious about plain language progress in the courtroom, where jurors' understanding of what they're being asked to do really does have life-or-death consequences. It turns out that many state and federal courts have revised the instructions they give to jurors so they can understand what they're promising to do. And some of these revisions are award-winning. The Center for Plain Language gave a 2011 ClearMark Award to the State Bar of Texas for revising the Texas Pattern Jury Instructions: Admonitory Instructions.

• Compare the Texas Bar's Before version to its After.
• Review the Utah State Courts Guidelines for Drafting Plain-Language Jury Instructions
• Read the Colorado Bar Association's Proposed Plain Language Revisions to criminal jury instructions

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